I had this strange feeling that i will have nothing to write. As my kids are getting "older" more "mature", I passed from embarrassing mother to annoying mother. Why not?
The truth is, I m annoyed. After 3 days of school, I feel probably more annoyed then kids.
I feel annoyed that even in the country like Ireland the girls are prohibited to wear short skirts and shorts. Not that I m encouraging it, but as much as I can understand it in India (and still not agree), I don t see the point in Dublin, where people on the street is walking in skirts looking more like a belt to me...I m probably having annoying view, but I feel difficulties to explain to my teens to love their body, respect their body, when the messages they get that there is something very inappropriate with their body...because in the french system we are agains wearing burka in the name of laicity and freedom, but the short is prohibited in the name of respect...of what? I don t get it.
Daniel, 8 grader, while asking if he is bilingual, answered: "NO, trilingual". For once (can I believe it?), he was answering correctly and politely. The class get hilarious about his answer and he get congratulations how he pulled leg of the teacher...apparently the teacher did not react at all. The fact is that Daniel IS trilingual (hey, Daniel, I m proud of you btw...). Ooops, we can forget very quickly that there are kids much more then trilingual and that in India many people speaks several languages.
This make me more smile, but what annoy me seriously, is the POINT of GOOD BEHAVIOR system in Elie's class ( 5th grade).
" In the class, we have a system to encourage us to respect the rules of 5th grade. If we don t respect the rules, we can have 5,3, or 1 penalty points. At the end of the week, we will be placed in the group of autonomy in function of the number of penalties. More penalties, less rights.".
(todays note)
Not to be aligned after recess quickly...one point of penalty.
Not to work quickly in the class, one point of penalty.
Not to move calmly, silently and with utility in the class...one point.
Not to obeyed the adults in the school...5 points.
To be insolent after the remarque of adult...5 points.
In total 26 "anti-rules", where you can get the penalty points. But who says what is insolent, what is quickly, and what is utility? Is not the personal perception that we may have each different?
As much as I want my child to be polite, to respect others, not only adults, but all, including children, I want them to learn and be calm, also want them free, spontaneous, smiling and happy. I want the school the space where kids have a right to ask, not to agree , express their needs and go with the pleasure and joy instead of fear of punishment.
Now, what to do? Go to see the teacher and ask him from where this is coming? Propose the "positive" reinforcement instead of punishment? Explain to the teacher that he can t really cut the rights of the children ( To be respected and safe, To work, To make mistakes, To eat in peace), because then he is cutting their fundamental rights? Make my "yoga" talk about positive thinking, about positive affirmation, and positive attitude in the life? About Freedom? Love? Hmmmm....
I don t think it would be appreciated...
So I can shut up and feel bad every morning because I m sending my son in the school with feeling of fear of punishment (hey, and what if he wants to be in the group with his friend so he will do some punishable stuff to make sure to get points?? And how about the feeling being ALWAYS in the worst group? What it is as feedback? I m BAD all year long?).
Let s face it, it is not about me, it is about Elie and his capacity to face new system and new school, new rules.
But it does not feel well...so far.
The truth is, I m annoyed. After 3 days of school, I feel probably more annoyed then kids.
I feel annoyed that even in the country like Ireland the girls are prohibited to wear short skirts and shorts. Not that I m encouraging it, but as much as I can understand it in India (and still not agree), I don t see the point in Dublin, where people on the street is walking in skirts looking more like a belt to me...I m probably having annoying view, but I feel difficulties to explain to my teens to love their body, respect their body, when the messages they get that there is something very inappropriate with their body...because in the french system we are agains wearing burka in the name of laicity and freedom, but the short is prohibited in the name of respect...of what? I don t get it.
Daniel, 8 grader, while asking if he is bilingual, answered: "NO, trilingual". For once (can I believe it?), he was answering correctly and politely. The class get hilarious about his answer and he get congratulations how he pulled leg of the teacher...apparently the teacher did not react at all. The fact is that Daniel IS trilingual (hey, Daniel, I m proud of you btw...). Ooops, we can forget very quickly that there are kids much more then trilingual and that in India many people speaks several languages.
This make me more smile, but what annoy me seriously, is the POINT of GOOD BEHAVIOR system in Elie's class ( 5th grade).
" In the class, we have a system to encourage us to respect the rules of 5th grade. If we don t respect the rules, we can have 5,3, or 1 penalty points. At the end of the week, we will be placed in the group of autonomy in function of the number of penalties. More penalties, less rights.".
(todays note)
Not to be aligned after recess quickly...one point of penalty.
Not to work quickly in the class, one point of penalty.
Not to move calmly, silently and with utility in the class...one point.
Not to obeyed the adults in the school...5 points.
To be insolent after the remarque of adult...5 points.
In total 26 "anti-rules", where you can get the penalty points. But who says what is insolent, what is quickly, and what is utility? Is not the personal perception that we may have each different?
As much as I want my child to be polite, to respect others, not only adults, but all, including children, I want them to learn and be calm, also want them free, spontaneous, smiling and happy. I want the school the space where kids have a right to ask, not to agree , express their needs and go with the pleasure and joy instead of fear of punishment.
Now, what to do? Go to see the teacher and ask him from where this is coming? Propose the "positive" reinforcement instead of punishment? Explain to the teacher that he can t really cut the rights of the children ( To be respected and safe, To work, To make mistakes, To eat in peace), because then he is cutting their fundamental rights? Make my "yoga" talk about positive thinking, about positive affirmation, and positive attitude in the life? About Freedom? Love? Hmmmm....
I don t think it would be appreciated...
So I can shut up and feel bad every morning because I m sending my son in the school with feeling of fear of punishment (hey, and what if he wants to be in the group with his friend so he will do some punishable stuff to make sure to get points?? And how about the feeling being ALWAYS in the worst group? What it is as feedback? I m BAD all year long?).
Let s face it, it is not about me, it is about Elie and his capacity to face new system and new school, new rules.
But it does not feel well...so far.
